for the silence.

Pretty manic week – I go on holiday to America tomorrow and have had to concentrate on work.

Ended on a pretty hard day… several people fired at work and had to explain it to rest of company. An ‘interesting’ experience.

Can’t wait to get on the plane tomorrow morning…lots of pleasures (hopefully) await as well as the man I love.


Sorry it’s taken me time to post this – had problems with YouTube and WordPress integrating but it’s still worth it posting.

Just hilarious and doesn’t need me saying anything more than that…

While I’m at it…

Let’s promote another bad thing about gay people!

We are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO desperate to have positive role models that we hook onto any piece of ‘tittle tattle’ about the sexuality any man/woman that is in the media spotlight and is even the slightest bit photogenic.

I know it’s been like it for years but it’s getting out of control.

When someone like the Manhunt blog can re-print ‘gossip’ which is so undescriptive that each part could refer to different people…that is obviously their right (enshrined in the US constitution)


When they then post several pictures of one particular person, they are seriously over-stepping the mark (both legally and morally).

I just hope that the person who has been pictured decides to take legal action…they need to think more before doing such things.

Sermon and complaining over for tonight!

So it continues…

God, gays can be pretty evil can’t they/we?

If it isn’t enough that someone took it upon themselves to let the rest of the ‘gay’ world that Mason Wyler is HIV positive, the fact that he confirmed the story means that people are spreading rumours/stories about him.

He’s now had to put up another post on his blog denying those stories. You can tell that he’s near breaking point.

Seriously, the guy is already going through hell – LEAVE HIM ALONE!


There are two stories related to HIV that have appeared in the last few days.

Firstly, today the well-known gay porn star Mason Wyler has confirmed on his blog that he is HIV positive. This happened because a former room-mate decided to put it on his Twitter page.

Obviously, there is some shit going on between the former roomies (as you can see from his tweets over the past few days)…

This was the picked up by a gay gossip website called ‘gayporngossip‘ (subtle eh?) who then outlined a lot more details.

They imply that all they are doing is reporting another website’s report but actually, they go a lot further:

Gaygossip's inappropriate take on Mason's sad news

So although Mason did confirm the news on his own blog, they ran the story before he was ready to announce it and secondly, that graphic over his image is pretty disgusting/inappropriate.

To brand him in such a public forum without his permission is a particularly sick action. To announce your health status to your friends, family, work or the wider world is a personal decision and one that only you can make once you are ready for those people to know.

Obviously, having read the article it’s is clear that the porn industry has known more for a while but does that give that website the right to take the ‘opportunity’ to detail it all, actually before he had confirmed it himself.

Me thinks not – only my personal opinion and probably a lot stronger than most people’s feelings as I have also had to deal with the shock of finding out that I’m HIV positive. My close friends know my status, as do a very select group of people at work (because they need to) but my family don’t know nor do a lot of my wider social network.

I’m not ready to tell them – they will know when I’m ready and not before.

What gives this website the right to announce Mason’s status? I don’t believe they have the right and never will. Nothing in their post explaining the situation is a justification for doing it, although I can imagine they believe it is.

The second story is the trial of a former German girl band member who is accused of infecting a partner by not informing them that she was HIV positive prior to having unprotected sex.

This brings up lots of issues of consent, whether sex a joint decision and therefore, both parties have to take joint responsibility of the repercussions from those actions if they’ve not openly discussed what they’re about to do, etc.

Now I’m realistic enough to know that people don’t sit down and both take a lie detector test or fill out a full questionnaire on their sexual history and health but where does the line lie?

Once again (and this is very much from a personal perspective), I can’t blame the person who made me positive…I’m more likely to blame myself for not asking the right questions. I have to take responsibility for my actions (or in this situation, my in-action).

This person writing in the Guardian has an interesting perspective…I’m not saying it’s totally right but there’s definitely some nuggets of truth in it.

Any other thoughts that you want to share?

How can something that feels SOOO good, be SOOO bad?!

yes, you know that feeling…that extra bit of chocolate, ‘just‘ one more glass of wine, that one more bump of ketamine (ha!)…you know you want them and yet, you know you’re gonna pay for it next day in some way.

Does it stop you from doing it? Of course not!

The thing is…there are some things that might be bad for you but they’re not THAT bad and you can deal with it.

Problem I have is that the thing that I know is bad for me, is REALLY bad for me but it doesn’t stop me wanting it.

What is this thing?

sit on that raw dick!

bareback sex!

There I’ve said it…I love bareback sex. There is no feeling like it in the world and anyone who says otherwise, has never had bareback sex.

Now as a gay man, I know we all supposedly know the risks but when you’ve experienced something that feels THAT amazing, all concern/thoughts/worries/panic disappears as you succumb to the intensity and explosion of emotions and sensations when you fuck raw.

[Sorry, there’s no other way to describe it]

And yet, I now know from personal experience that it can be devastatingly bad.

Earlier this year, I was diagnosed as HIV positive.

Am I still coming to terms with that news? Probably.

Was it a huge shock? Honestly, not really.

Lesson learnt? Nope.

I crave it, dream of it, want it constantly…

When I watch porn, I only seem to get off to bareback stuff.

Does that mean I now only fuck bareback? no.

I’m now in a relationship with an HIV negative guy – we fuck with condoms, I love sex with him.

Do I wish it was bareback? God yes…would do anything for his beautiful cock raw in me and unloading his cum deep inside my ass.

As I said, I crave raw sex and know he would love that too but we don’t because as much as it feels soooooooooooooooooooooo¬† good, it would be sooooooooooooooooooooooooo bad.

But I can’t stop thinking about this:

want that to be me!

Please will someone do this to me?!

At last

Someone speaks sensibly and interprets the US Constitution correctly rather than the ridiculous Republican rhetoric that gets thrown around:

Happens that the person to stand up and say it, is the President.

But that’s what the President is there for – be a stable hand and reasonable voice when people go stupid and forget the common decency that we should expect and reward everyone.

Although – it is about time, as this issue has been flying around for several weeks but better late than never.

I just wish he would be as forthcoming over Prop 8 and the issue of gay marriage.

Come on President Obama, set the example again and support the issue of fundamental rights for all.